


Can you pretend to be my boyfriend, please?

by laramads



Category: Harry Potter - Fandom
Genre: Drabble, Fluff, Fluff and Humor, Love them, M/M, Muggle AU, One Shot, Remus is taller then Sirius by like a lot and i will fight you if you think otherwise, but im right, cheeky!Remus, cute sirius, jk i cant hurt anyone, kinda rushed, otp, remus taller then sirius, sirius shorter then remus, ten seconds of angst, wolfstar
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-08
Updated: 2016-08-08
Packaged: 2018-08-07 10:44:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,253
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7711903
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/laramads/pseuds/laramads
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sirius didn’t have a boyfriend, his latest relationship ended two months ago.<br/>But Roger didn’t know that.<br/>“Yeah, I do have a boyfriend, he’s here now and if he finds out you’ve been trying to get in my pants he won’t be happy.”<br/>“Oh yeah? Where is he?”<br/>Sirius halted, he really didn’t think this through. Where was James? He would go along with the lie in a heartbeat. </p><p>He was going to strangle the bastard.<br/>“He’s uh… that one over there.”<br/>Sirius pointed at a man sitting down in a booth with three other girls who were laughing.<br/>“I don’t believe you, prove it.”<br/>Sirius wanted to punch himself in the face.<br/>.....</p><p>Sirius just wanted to loosen up and have a drink.<br/>And all this happened.<br/>At least he got a gorgeous and cute boyfriend in the end.<br/></p>
            </blockquote>





	Can you pretend to be my boyfriend, please?

**Author's Note:**

> Hello!  
> Dunno if I like this one but let me know if you do.  
> I'll probably post on tumblr as well.  
> This drabble feels kind of rushed?  
> hope you enjoy the story and my favourite ship.  
> Edit: I wrote this a bit back and to me it seemed rushed and wanted to fix it. I finally did! Lara xx

“Come on, hot stuff, let’s go rent a room upstairs.”  
Sirius gagged and pushed the man's hands away from his chest.  
“Please, leave me alone. I have no interest in you, you’re twice my age.” 

“Who cares. Come on baby, let’s go have some fun together.” The man, who had previously introduced himself as Roger, tried to reach out for him again but missed as Sirius took a step back.

He couldn’t see James, Peter or Frank anywhere in the loud and crowded club.  
How the hell was he supposed to get out of this situation? 

“What’s wrong? Do you have a boyfriend or something?” Roger looked at him accusingly and started looking around the club as if he would find Sirius’ boyfriend. 

Sirius didn’t have a boyfriend, his latest relationship ended two months ago.  
But Roger didn’t know that. 

“Yeah, I do have a boyfriend, he’s here now and if he finds out you’ve been trying to get in my pants he won’t be happy.” 

“Oh yeah? Where is he?”  
Sirius halted, he really didn’t think this through. Where was James? He would go along with the lie in a heartbeat. 

He was going to strangle the bastard.  
“He’s uh… that one over there.”  
Sirius pointed at a man sitting down in a booth with three other girls who were laughing.  
“I don’t believe you, prove it.”  
Sirius wanted to punch himself in the face.

 

He made sure his back was facing Roger as he walked slowly towards the other man's table.  
As he got closer he noticed how gorgeous the man looked.  
Tawny curls falling into his eyes, pouty lips and freckled cheeks. 

Thank Merlin he didn’t choose another old bastard. 

He reached the table, stilled and opened his mouth before closing it again.  
What the hell was he supposed to say?  
Uh, sir this old man behind me is trying to get in my pants and I said you were my boyfriend, could you please do something boyfriend-y so that he’ll leave me alone? 

Sirius prayed that the gorgeous man didn’t slap him. 

The laughing and talking abruptly stopped as they all looked to stare at Sirius.  
“Can we help you?” The redhead asked, her head cocked slightly to the side.  
“Uh, well… I could kind of use your help.” He looked directly at the man and gathered up as much courage as he could find. “There is this old man behind me that’s trying to get in my pants and I said you were my boyfriend so could you please do something boyfriend-y so that he’ll leave me alone?” 

The man’s amber eyes went a shade darker as he looked over Sirius’ shoulder before looking back at Sirius with a teasing grin.  
“Sure thing, love. Come ‘ere.” Sirius’ mouth almost fell open at the sound of the man’s voice. 

The man’s arms were open, inviting him to sit down.  
In his lap.  
“Uh… are you sure I mean I know I asked for your help but I don’t want make you uncomfortable-”  
Sirius almost shrieked when he was tugged and fell on top of a lap with arms encircling his waist.  
“Relax, love. Gotta make it look believable don’t we?” The man’s mouth was right next to his ear allowing Sirius to feel his hot breath tickle his ear. 

Sirius shivered again and heard the giggling of the three girls opposite him.  
The redhead looked at Sirius with an amused and knowing grin.  
“My names Lily. This is Marlene and Alice.” She nudged her head to the left and the the two girls nodded in acknowledgement. “And the idiot you’re sitting on is Remus.” 

“Uh… hi, my name is Sirius. Like the star.”  
“Cute.” Remus said, arms tightened around Sirius.  
Sirius instinctively snuggled closer into Remus’ chest.  
“What me or my name?” Sirius could feel his usual confidence return.  
“Both.” Remus’ lips were on his neck when he answered. “The guy’s still looking.”  
“Yeah, well he’s a bit of a bloody pest.” Sirius stated before letting out a surprised noise when Remus kissed his neck. 

“Remus, get a room before you attack the poor guy.”  
“Shut up Alice,” was Remus’ muffled reply, whose head was currently buried in the crook of Sirius’ neck.  
Sirius felt hot all over.  
He hoped Remus didn’t let go of him any time soon. 

Slowly, the table eased up into a light conversation.  
“Oh, please Marlene, when you first met Remus you were drooling everywhere, it was embarrassing.” Lily teased pushing Marlene slightly.  
“I was not!” Marlene said faking to be annoyed but a smile was tugging on her lips, giving her away.  
Sirius could feel Remus chuckle, chest moving against his back. 

Maybe it was the lack of sleep that had accumulated in the past two weeks from all the cramming that made Sirius fall asleep in Remus’ lap or possibly the safe embrace he was currently in. All he knew was that he went to rest his eyes for only a few moments and ended up falling asleep in a club that reeked of sweat and music loud enough to make your ears throb. 

“Aw, Remus, look! He’s fallen asleep. Poor thing must've been so tired.” Alice giggled slightly, her doe eyes swimming with sympathy and her usual kindness.  
Remus looked down and chuckled softly. 

“He’s cute when sleeps. No, scratch that he’s always cute.”  
Lily rolled her eyes while Marlene sniggered.  
“God, Remus you are such a man-whore. What are we going to do with you?” Marlene said with no bite to her words.  
Remus only responded by giving them a wolfy grin.

xxx 

“Look mate, you need to calm down. I’m not doing anything wrong. Your friend is not being abducted. He needed some help and we helped him.” Sirius blinked the sleep out of his eyes and could hear Remus’ loud tone.  
What the fuck was happening?

“You need to get your hands off him, until he wakes up.” Sirius’ eyes snapped open at James’ voice. “He’s awake! Sirius, don’t worry, we’ll get this guys grubby hands off you. Ladies you may want to close your eyes.”

“James?” Sirius asked sweetly.

“Yes?” 

“I’m going to kill you and your friends.”  
James stepped back in mock suprise.  
“What the hell did I do?”  
Sirius shot out from Remus’ grip. “You three left me to deal with the bloody old, sleazy piece of needy shit.”  
“You’re upset about that? I thought you were gonna get him off your tail in five minutes.”  
“Well I bloody didn’t and almost accidentally clawed my eyes out trying to stop him from not only groping me but from touching my hair. MY HAIR JAMES. MY POOR, GLORIOUS HAIR. Remus catch me, you're the only faithful one here, along with your hot friends.” Sirius fell backwards and Remus caught him while laughing. 

“Come here, you dork.” Sirius sat on Remus’ lap once again and didn’t even flinch, like he usually did when someone touched his hair, when Remus rested his chin on his head.  
“That enough proof for you… James, was it?” Lily asked sweetly, batting her eyelashes mockingly. 

Sirius watched Peter hit James over the head when James didn’t say anything except stare at Lily mouth opening and closing.  
“Uh… I don’t know your name so can I call you mine?” James said lamely. 

Silence. 

“That was awful.” Lily’s comment caused everyone to burst into laughter while James scratched his neck embarrassedly. 

He felt Remus move his head to his ear.  
“Wanna go outside for a breather with me?”  
“Sure thing.”  
“I wasn’t going to give you a choice anyway.”  
Sirius laughed as he got up, brushing some dust off his jeans, and started walking.  
Sirius took two steps before he was lifted off his feet.  
“Where do you think you’re going?”  
“Remus put me down.” Sirius shouted trying to squirm, out of his grip.  
“Now, we can’t do that, anyone could just abduct you. You’re lucky that I’m going out of my way just to prevent your cute butt from being taken.”  
Sirius looked up in time to see Remus wink down at him. 

Sirius huffed and crossed his hands, pouting. 

Remus looked down at the adorably gorgeous man in his arms who jutting out his bottom lip sinfully.  
He hoped there was Holy water somewhere nearby because the things he wanted to do to the man were filthy and completely unreasonable to be thinking about since he'd only just met him. 

The fresh air hit them roughly and Remus could feel Sirius shiver.  
He pulled the boy closer into his chest while both of them stayed quiet, listening to each other breathe while watching the deserted road that was only lit up with one light. 

“You know, you’re probably the cutest and yet most gorgeous person I’ve ever met.”  
Remus’ voice sliced through the silence. 

Sirius replied instantly.  
“Obviously you haven’t seen yourself.” 

Remus chuckled and sat down on the filthy pavement, not caring if his jeans got muddy; he just wanted Sirius as close as possible. 

“Smooth, Sirius. Real smooth.” 

“Yeah, I thought so. Have I wooed you yet, or do I need to start using my pick up lines?” 

“Are they as bad as your friends?” 

“Oh Merlin’s left ballsack no.”

“Merlins left ballsack?” 

“Mhm, I also have ogre shit, goblins toenails, dementors dick and-” 

“You may want to stop before you make me fall in love with you and your way with words.” 

“You mean I haven’t made you fall in love with me yet? Time to use my smooth pick up lines”  
Remus laughed and shook his head at the raven haired man.

“Okay, Okay. Are you google ‘cause you’re everything I’m searching for.”

Remus pressed his lips together to stop the laughter that threatened to leave his mouth. 

Sirius pouted and tried again.  
“Are you an alien? Because you abducted my heart.”  
Remus’ smiled amused, which Sirius took a sigh of encouragement. 

“Your lips look lonely. Would they like to meet mine?” 

Sirius smiled toothily, and looked up at Remus who was staring at him weirdly,  
“My lips are very lonely and would very much like to meet yours.” 

Sirius’ eyes widened at Remus’ wicked grin.  
“Wha-? Ho-? You...Huh?” Sirius spluttered causing Remus to laugh for a moment.  
Sirius’ eyes were irresistibly wide, helping the faint blue flecks in his storm grey eyes become more prominent under the eyeliner he had put on. 

They stared at eachother for a couple of seconds before Remus leaned in and pressed his slightly chapped lips to Sirius’ soft ones. 

Sirius wove his arms around Remus’ neck, lifting himself so that he was straddling him.  
Remus still held Sirius by the waist, pulling him flush against his chest. 

Sirius started to grind on him, slow and teasing as their hot and wet tongues danced in each others mouths.  
Sirius was mewling, making the most filthy sounds that Remus had ever heard.  
Both men had never been so turned on in their lives.  
Sirius gave a lingering kiss before attacking the taller man's long, pale neck. He sucked and licked, causing Remus to groan out loud and clutch Sirius’ ass tightly. Sirius squeaked in suprise before moaning in lust.  
Remus took the chance to give Sirius a hickey; sucking and nibbling, loving the sounds that escaped his throat.  
When Sirius let out a rather long and filthy moan Remus realised that they had to stop, or he wouldn't be able to pull away. 

Remus pulled away. “We need to stop before I fuck you on this pavement.” He said panting, eyes dark with lust.  
Sirius grinned at up at him shamefully before hiding his face in the taller man's warm neck, fingers gently touching the hickey on his neck. 

Their breathing was in sync as silence lapsed again, forcing Remus to think about the previous couple of hours.  
“Sirius?”  
“Yeah?”  
“Why don’t you like it when people touch your hair?”  
Remus felt Sirius stiff, his grip on Remus’s shirt becoming tighter. 

“When mum couldn’t hit me because we had an important party or whatever and didn’t want anyone to notice she would pull my hair really hard. Sometimes it came out or started bleeding. Dad used it to throw me against walls.” Sirius was quiet and Remus could feel his shoulder become a bit damp. 

“Shh… baby, it’s okay, I won’t let them hurt you, yeah?”  
Sirius nodded in his shoulder and sniffled.  
He looked up at Remus and wiped his nose and looked up at him like a lost kitten.  
“Can I sleep at your place tonight? I really like your cuddles. And can you keep calling me baby and love? I really like those type of names, especially when they come from you.” 

Remus chuckled and nodded.  
“Of course, baby. Want to go now?”  
“Yes please.”  
“Alright, love. Let’s go find my car. Lily's gonna have to ride with James.”  
“She’s going to kill him.”  
“I know.”  
Sirius giggled and stared at Remus as he walked to his car. 

“You know, you’ll have to let go of me while I drive.”  
“... Do I have to?”  
“Unless you want to get killed.”  
“...Fine.”  
“Remy?”  
“Yeah, love?”  
“I like it when you touch my hair.”  
If Remus went home with Sirius that night while smiling like an idiot (with a massive boner) he would never admit it. 

Unless it was Sirius who asked.  
Because in just over an hour, that boy had Remus wrapped around his finger, and didn’t even know it.


End file.
